The story of the Vancouver Tattoo Fiasco

Christina: "Hey, let's go for pedicures!"

Shelley: "No. I hate pedicures, they hurt."

At this point Shelley and Christina walk by

a tattoo shop on West Broadway and shelley suggests getting a tattoo.

Christina agrees, because she thinks that Shelley

is bluffing. They walk into the shop and Christina

picks out a tattoo of a 1940s puppy. (Betty Boop's

puppy as a matter of fact.) Jimmy, the artist, says that

the picture is ugly and looks for a better one on google.

Christina still thinks that Shelley is bluffing.

Christina is up first.

"This guy is going to be mad once Shelley admits

that she's bluffing," she thinks to herself.

Jimmy puts the outline on Christina's upper thigh

and tells her to look at it. She says no, it's fine.

She thinks that this is all a bluff and that she will

not go through with the tattoo. Jimmy asks

her again to look, reminding her that tattoos are

permanent. She declines again.

He then tells her to get on the table.

Christina still thinks that Jimmy is going to be mad

once the whole thing is called off. She has no intention

of getting a tattoo.

Christina (in her head): "Wow, he is going to be so mad."

Jimmy: "Okay, I am going to start now."

Christina: "Ummm...What?! Oh...Right...Ok..."

Buzzzzz....

Christina is now in what she describes as the worst pain

in her life. She doesn't hide her pain as Jimmy draws the

pudgy little puppy on her leg.

Christina (in her head): "Oh shit. I guess Shelley wasn't bluffing."

And there he is, a cute little thing. Only problem is that

Christina should have looked at the stencil outline before

Jimmy inked her; the cute little dog is on her upper left

thigh, ogling her crotch. Christina says she feels violated.

Shelley's turn!

Shelley: "This is so awesome. It doesn't even hurt!"

Shelley gets a monarch butterfly on her lower back. (And no,

it is not a tramp-stamp! It's off to the left side, and was

supposed to be lower...)

Shelley: "Awesome!"

(Note: Christina was in the back looking at a mirror at her

pervy little puppy. She complained for the next couple of days

about how painful this experience was.)

The End.

Truth and Reconciliation: Be a part of it.

I signed up to volunteer for the Truth and Reconciliation Commission's National Event from June 16 - 19. I will be taking written statements from residential school survivors about their experiences in the residential school system.

For me this is something that I am compelled to do because of my heritage, and perhaps even more importantly, because of my grandmother; she was a residential school survivor who suffered a great deal at the hands of this system. In turn, her children suffered...

My grandmother died when I was just a baby, so I have no memory of who she was. However, I have my ideals and my father's childhood stories to remind me, and although I know that she lived in a very dark place for much of her life, I like to imagine how things could have been for her...

There is a call for people to come forward and volunteer for this event. The commission is still looking to fill a number of positions; including statement takers, registration takers and set up people. Anyone can apply (they are not just looking for people of aboriginal descent) and the rewards of being a part of this historic event will be great.

For those of you who are looking to do something meaningful, this project fits the bill, as this issue is extremely sensitive and life-changing for so many people. Or, if you need something to spruce up your resume, volunteering for the TRC is an excellent opportunity not only to showcase your writing skills and abilities, but it will also show that you are diverse and have (or will have) an understanding of something that is embedded so deeply into Canada's history. (CreComm: This would be an excellent resume piece for all of you, especially J and Media students, as they are looking for statement takers in written, video and audio form...)

Click here for the online application.

T: Tragedy

CBC/FREE PRESS PHOTO

An 11-year old boy is dead. He died in a house fire on the Shamattawa reserve, an isolated northern community approximately 750 kilometres away from Winnipeg.

This little boy, identified as Edward Redhead, was in the care of family services at the time of his death, apparently orphaned by his mother who committed suicide.

A 16-year old boy has been arrested in connection with the fire.

I am so angry right now.

This little boy fell through the cracks of a system, died alone in a shabby house engulfed in flames, and his absence went unnoticed. He wasn't reported missing for a number of days.

This story is tragic disparity to the core, and yet in a week or so his name will be forgotten from the headlines because something else will have happened by then.

I don't want to sit here and blame the government, or the "system", or the illusive "white man". But something has got to change. -- And I know it's hypocritical coming from me, considering that I have lived in the comfortable city all my life. I know that I don't know what it feels like not to have heat or drinkable water. I admit that I have no idea what it's like to live on the edge of the province, in the middle of nowhere, isolated. But I do know that something in the faulty system needs to be changed. (Perhaps the first thing would be to move beyond blaming the "system", and actually creating a process where change is made...)

With this little boy's tragic death comes the question of how can something like this can happen. -- I can't even put into words how devastated I am.

Twenty-Ten. Bring it on.

The best thing I ever did for myself was deciding to go back to school. I don't regret one second of it, even if it means that I am no longer "financially comfortable"...

Over the last two-and-a-half years, I have encountered so many incredible things in my life; self awareness, knowledge, empathy, opportunity, confidence, relationships, etc. -- It's like I've become a whole different person than the girl I used to be.

There have been hardships in my life over the last two-and-a-half years, and I expect that they ("hardships") will continue throughout my life (That's just life, right?!), but the way that I look at problems and life's little "curve balls" is so different than the way that I used to; the hard things in life are the things that make you stronger.

I have no idea what 2010 holds for me, but I look forward to meeting new opportunities, and confronting challenges along the way. You only live once, you may as well take it for all it's worth...

T, Tiger, Tiger

Oh Tiger, Tiger, Tiger...

Squeaky clean golfer Tiger Woods has been caught with his pants down, so to speak.

Last week US Weekly broke the story about Woods having an affair with a 24-year old cocktail waitress, and now the media frenzy surrounding Woods is a complete gong show! (Do you expect anything less?!)

Since the story broke, Woods has gotten into a single-vehicle car accident, with his wife smashing in the windows of his Escalade; text messages and a voicemail that he sent to his 24-year mistress leaked to the media; and a number of other women who have come out of the woodwork claiming that they have also had an affair with him. (last time I checked, there were three.)

The thing that gets me is how shocked and surprised everybody seems to be about this; call me crazy, but the guy is a fairly good-looking billionaire, who, although he is married, likely has millions of hot women throwing themselves at him every day?!

I'm not trying to justify his behaviour, but logically speaking, most people -- including "squeaky clean celebs" -- are only as faithful as their opportunities. (Woods is like the proverbial kid in a candy store, who bought the kit-kat, but could afford to buy the whole damn store...)

I dunno.

I know that he is a public figure, who has managed (until recently) to maintain a very good image within the media; but he got caught doing something he shouldn't have, and now everybody is taking every opportunity to persecute him.

The guy is probably paying the heftiest punishment at home. -- If I were his wife, I don't even know what I would do. (It's too bad she has to be scorned in such a public light.)

T, tattoo: I thought it would be less painful than a pedicure...

In February, when I was in Vancouver visiting lil' sis, she suggested that we go for pedicures. I told her no, because "they hurt too much." (I hate when people touch my feet.) While she said this, we were walking down West Broadway, past a tattoo shop, I suggested a tattoo instead...

I still maintain that it is less painful than a pedicure.

P.S. this is not, I repeat, this is NOT a "tramp stamp"! -- It's off to the side, and was supposed to be lower, so nobody could see it. I would have gotten it on my shoulder, but I already have one there... (See below; my stick girls, they represent my sisters and I! -- Looks kinda gross, cause I was in the middle of getting it when this pic was taken...It's not even coloured in yet.)

T, TERRIFIED!

Well, I'm pretty sure that I am too scared to sleep now. (I guess that's not a bad thing, as I have so many assignments due tomorrow...But shucks; I was going to take a nap before the big all-nighter!!)

I just happened to have the TV on the History channel tonight; and low and behold there is a TV show about Nostradamus.

Oh shit.

Now normally I am pretty brave, and don't buy into all this stuff. However, I am alone in my apartment, my front light is burned out, and I am starting to over-think everything that these people from the History channel are feeding me. (Doesn't help that the smooth, scary voice of the narrator is the kind of voice that is going to narrate my nightmares tonight!!)

Ugh.

These "researchers" and "specialists" are creeping me out too, explaining how messed up people are now-a-days, and how we're ruining the planet, and running out of food...etc, etc, etc.

I hate when I get freaked out over stupid TV shows; it takes me back to when I was a kid, and I was scared to death of Unsolved Mysteries, and even more scared of the host, Robert Stack! (Seriously, I was so scared of Unsolved Mysteries, but at the same time I was so friggin intrigued. -- I used to beg my mom to let me watch it, even though she and I both knew that I was going to be terrified at bed time...)

That creepy theme song still resounds in my head, and every time I think of it I can picture a stoic Robert Stack appearing from around a corner in some foggy back ally, wearing his trench coat and staring at me with his piercing eyes...

Ugh.

I can't decide what scared me more; the reenactments of the aliens abducting people (I slept with my light on for years!!) Or, the people who wanted to hide their identity, and talked behind a mysterious shadow with that really creepy voice disguise thing...

That settles it, I am never sleeping again.

I am pretty sure that after tonight, I am never allowed to watch TV ever again.

T - The Terrified Blogger

So here we are, mid-semester, and all 75 CreComm students (as well as some of our instructors) are entangled in the wonderful world of blogging!

I love the fact that I am required to have a blog for school; extra marks for something that I love doing, and have been doing for years anyway?! (Heck yes, I'll have an order of that with a side of awesome!)

There is however a downside to this blog-mania that has taken over Red River College.

You see, since I am in CreComm, and professionalism is of the utmost importance in this program, and in the 'real world' outside of this program; I am now terrified to write anything that I might be too risky, too 'out there', too 'unprofessional'...Yep. I am now essentially too scared to write anything that is actually interesting...

My blog now, I will admit, is a little bland. It's like to oatmeal of blogs; decent, but nothing to get too excited about. (Seriously, how many people wake up in the morning -- besides me -- and say; 'Heck yes, I'm having oatmeal for breakfast! -- I suspect that the same amount of people log onto their computers and say: 'Heck yes, I'm going to read Shelley's blog today!)

Ugh! (A big fat "Ugh" at that!)

Years ago, before I realized that there would be any recourse for my blogging actions, I wasn't afraid to put my thoughts out there in the unforgiving abyss of the Internet...Heck, I actually craved a good scandal on my blog. However, once I became a student, and was warned and informed by so many people in the professional and academic world of the ramifications of putting myself out there, I got scared.

And now, I am beyond scared; I am terrified!

I don't want to miss out on job opportunities because of what I have posted on the net; I sure don't want to have to eat my words, or have someone use them against me; and I sure as hell don't want to seem ignorant, or ill-informed to -- in my mind -- the millions of people that might, and probably, read my blog! Yet at the same time, I don't want a blog that is just so oatmeal!!

I want a blog that stands out; and I want something that people will actually read, and enjoy reading; and most of all I want to be able to blog without the intense paranoia that I am essentially screwing up my life and my potential career by what I post! -- I miss the freedom that I used to have as an "ignorant blogger".

Ugh, what a conundrum!

I guess I should find a balance. (At least that's what all the people who have peace of mind about what they blog about would tell me. But frankly my dear blog-friends) I just don't know how.

Suffice to say, I am still indeed trying to make my blog awesome, funny, clever, well written...etc, but I think it will take me a little while longer to break free from the terror that has been embedded in my thoughts by people who feel so inclined to warn me about recourse for my blogging-actions.

Well, now that I am panic-stricken, and about to have an anxiety attack about what I have posted on my blog thus far, I must say, I still really do love the idea that we are blogging in class!

Thanks Kenton!

The joy of tech courtesy of www.theeastvilliageidiot.com